A well-planned Mutual has the potential to be a laboratory for living and practicing the principles that young men and young women learn in Sunday meetings, according to Elder Jack H Goaslind, Young Men general president, and Ardeth G. Kapp, Young Women general president.

"A lot of the youths' Church experience is rather formal in the classroom or in Sunday meetings, and they need experiences that will help them understand that membership in the Church is a total way of life," Pres. Kapp explained.Elder Goaslind added: "Mutual should reinforce the principles taught in Sunday lessons. It's not enough to just learn in Sunday meetings. We must learn to live the principles, to love and to serve."

In an interview with the Church News, Elder Goaslind and Pres. Kapp shared their insights on the Mutual program and its re-emphasis, which came some time ago when the First Presidency reiterated the importance of effective weekday Young Men and Young Women activities that reinforce gospel principles.

Instructions to leaders were printed in Bulletin 1991-2, which stated that the term Mutual has been designated for the weekday activities.

"More important, this gives an emphasis to the importance of the role of the bishopric youth committee, the Aaronic Priesthood/Young Women committee and bishop's discussions on Sunday evenings," Elder Goaslind remarked. "If we are going to have an effective Mutual, it has to be planned with a purpose, and these committees can do that.

"Activities with a purpose are activities that will change hearts and convert. That's what we ought to be looking for, something that changes hearts."

Pres. Kapp continued: "The purpose has to be unique to experiences that youth can have in the gospel. They can have friends at school and have a good experience there, but if they have experiences that are shared with people who have the same values and standards, they become a support group for each other. There becomes a sense of membership in a group where they feel a commonality of basic values and commitment."

Leaders also should help the youth plan group activities with the opposite sex that would help them interact with each other and build healthy relationships in their formative years, Elder Goaslind emphasized.

"If we can help these young people get a vision of how to react and how to interact with each other in a wholesome setting, I think that they'll develop traits that would be helpful to them in years to come," he said.

Pres. Kapp added: "I think one of the benefits of Mutual is that young men and young women come together in non-dating relationships, where they can have respect and appreciation for one another without feeling like there is some social commitment to a dating relationship."

Elder Goaslind continued, "We hope this opens the doors to roadshows, drama and dance - all of the things that are meaningful in building those relationships."

Mutual activities can be particularly important in areas where youth don't have much association with members of the Church in their school, Pres. Kapp added.

"When they come to the meetinghouse," she said, "they feel part of a safe fold. It is somewhere where they are accepted and where there is a common commitment. They don't have to defend anything, but are being supported. That's very important in their formative years, to feel the security of a group that extends beyond the family."

The general presidencies expressed the hope that Mutual will help build meaningful relationships between young men and young women and their parents as activities are occasionally planned to include the parents as well. "That door is open now," Elder Goaslind explained. "I think that interaction with the youth and their own parents needs a lot of strengthening."

Another aspect of Mutual is that it provides a vehicle for youth to bring their non-member friends to Church in a setting that is non-threatening, Elder Goaslind said.

Mutual is also a place where youth can learn the joy of service and the responsibility of leadership. "I think that one of the great things that comes from the class presidencies and quorum presidencies is a sense of responsibility for class members," Pres. Kapp remarked. "They learn to have some sense of accountability. They have a concern, an interest in the welfare of each other."

Having opening exercise at least once a month provides youth a chance to develop talents as they conduct meetings under the direction of the bishopric or perform musical numbers for the meetings.

"When our youth are involved in the youth program of the Church - and the program is working in ways that are not just entertainment - then they have experiences that help them feel significant, that they can contribute, that they are understood and that they're capable," Pres. Kapp added.

"If those kinds of feelings are present in their lives, it helps prevent them from seeking approval or acceptance in undesirable situations."

In the past few years, fewer weekly Church activities were held so that youth were not away from home as much, but "the fact of the matter is you can't keep them home every night," Elder Goaslind remarked.

"When I was growing up, my life was centered around the Church. I still got my homework done and everything else, but instead of going places where I ought not to be, I was over at Church participating and associating with others. Now I could take a drive and wouldn't find a light on in many Church buildings during the week. With the exception of Monday, the buildings shouldn't be dark every day but Sunday."

While it may not be possible for youth to meet during the week in some parts of the world where distance makes it difficult, wise leaders and quorum and class presidents can find things that would be compatible with what the general presidencies are suggesting, Elder Goaslind explained.

Many youth leaders have asked questions about how often to meet or what to do, but Pres. Kapp encouraged: "If the bishop's youth committee is really functioning the way it's intended to, it would meet to consider the needs of the youth in each unit and ask, `What are the needs and how can we best meet them?' Local leaders will receive the inspiration concerning their stewardship."

Activities should be planned by the bishopric youth committee, which includes class and quorum presidencies and their advisers, and then the Aaronic Priesthood/Young Women committee should carry out the plan, she explained.

Such activities might include service projects, educational experiences, career planning as well as recreational and sports activities, Elder Goaslind commented.

"We're certainly not trying to exclude `fun and games' out of the program," he said. "That's a vital part of the development of young men and young women. If we just tried to have the youth do service projects and other things we'd lose them overnight."

Pres. Kapp added: "Sports is a great part of the Young Women program, but what we do have a concern for is that some wards, where they've been so enthused with sports, have had a total sports program at the exclusion of everything else. We can't have any part of the program put at risk.

"Youth need physical, social and emotional development as well as spiritual development. They need a well-rounded experience that's appropriate to their age."

Bishops and branch presidents should also realize that caring for the youth in the Church is their major responsibility, Elder Goaslind admonished. "When they start losing interest in the youth because they don't have any time, then we lose the youth."

Both leaders recalled the 1986 General Women's Meeting address of President Ezra Taft Benson when he said: "Bishops, stay close to both your young men and young women. Give as much attention to the Young Women program as you do to the Young Men program. Be concerned about their activities, their classes, their camp-outs, their socials, their firesides and conferences. Recognize with equal prominence both young men and young women."

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Helps youth learn and live the gospel

- Strong faith and gospel understanding provides foundation for life.

- Developing faith brings strength and a desire to serve.

- Youth who love the Lord love and respect themselves and others.

"And now, behold, I give unto you a commandment, that when ye are assembled together ye shall instruct and edify each other, that ye may know how to act..."

Develops youth leadership

- Leadership skills are developed through Bishopric Youth Committee, AP-YW Committee and presidency meetings.

- Well-trained presidencies become effective leaders of other youth.

Builds meaningful relationships

-Friendships are important.

- Youth need to value each others' strengths and contributions.

- Develop brother/sister vs. romantic

relationships.

"Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands." (D&C 121:9.)

Provides service opportunities

- Service is the essence of Christianity.

- We love those whom we serve.

- Youth feel valued when they serve.

"...When ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God." (Mosiah 2:17.)

A place for less-active, non-member friends.

- Mutual activities can benefit most everyone.

- Less-active and non-member youth can feel welcome.

- Environment is wholesome, safe and uplifting.

Preparation for life

- Encourage excellence in school, activities.

- Counsel with parents, leaders about key decisions.

- Prepare to receive temple ordinances.

- Ready self for marriage and family life.

- Consider career options.

- Become a well-rounded, interesting person.

"For verily I say unto you, that great things await you." (D&C 45:62.)