Although we, as Church members, have responsibility for each other, when we come right down to it, the choice for Church participation is ours. As a bishop, I suggest the following for new members:

- Attend Church meetings and activities. This way you get to know others in the ward.- Meet with your bishop so he knows who you are and what talents you have with which you can serve the ward and its members. If you don't get a calling right away, ask for one.

- Let ward members know who you are, which enhances friendships.

- Bear your testimony. This helps forge spiritual bonds.

- Invite other members over for dinner as well as the missionaries. This is an excellent way to meet members, to make friends and to get to know others.

The bottom line is that if you'll live your religion, then you probably won't have any trouble with Church involvement. If you will look for the good and the positive, then you will enhance your participation in the Church. - Dan "Toby" Tolbert, Athens, Ga.

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How we did it:

Show interest

- Be involved in Church meetings and activities. Show interest. By doing so, you make contact with other Church members.

- Work on developing your testimony. A strong testimony comes from praying daily, studying the scriptures and living gospel principles.

- Be patient with other Church members. All of us have weaknesses. By following the Savior, we can become perfected.

- Never give up. The Savior said to endure to the end. Realize that's what we're all trying to do. We are all trying to develop our testimonies. - Norman Ross, Sparks, Nev.

Reach out

Since joining the Church, I have striven to do the following:

- Attend all my Church meetings. I feel that the meetings are interwoven and all of them are very important, not just sacrament meeting. Meetings have helped me to focus on what's really important - that is seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteouness.

Relief Society and homemaking meetings are very important because they give me an opportunity to not only get acquainted with other sisters, but also the opportunity to serve.

- Gain knowledge. This is why Sunday School is important. In one Sunday School class I attended early in my membership, I was greatly inspired by my Gospel Doctrine teacher to study the scriptures and to know the gospel.

Some good ways of gaining more gospel knowledge are to attend institute and Know Your Religion classes.

- Reach out. One ward I attended as a new convert taught me that when I reach out to other members, I find some wonderful people. I sought someone to sit with in Church rather than waiting for someone to sit with me.

Outside of Church meetings, I invited Relief Society sisters to my home for lunch. That was an excellent way to reach out and get to know people.

- Attend the temple. For their first year in the Church, new members can do baptisms for the dead. Temple work has helped make me see that Heavenly Father loves each and every one of us. He doesn't have favorites.

- Attend general conference and stake conference. I've had many questions answered while I've listened to speakers.

- Uplift others. Pick out the good in others.

- Pray for strength.

One of my challenges in life is a neurological disorder called dystonia. I learned that we all have some physical thing to overcome, and we all have weaknesses. By serving others and forgetting about ourselves, we gain a deep love for others and focus more on Jesus Christ. My guideline is, "What would my Savior do?" - Karina DeVore, Colorado Springs, Colo.

No stranger

A year ago, when I first visited the Church, I found a seat in a pew and sat down. A couple of Relief Society sisters walked past and smiled but didn't speak directly to me. Although I felt a bit uncomfortable, I smiled back. Then I overheard them saying, "There's a stranger in our regular seat, we'll have to sit elsewhere." I didn't want to be a stranger to anyone - especially in Church. I was heartsick!

When I eventually joined the Church, I invited the entire branch to my home for an old-fashioned ice cream social. I wanted everyone to be included, especially the two sisters I had encountered my first day in Church. This was my way of getting to know my new Church family and allowing them to get to know me.

Immediately, I became active in Relief Society, visiting teaching and homemaking meetings. I took to heart my calling in the Primary and made the effort to go visit the homes of the children in Primary, meeting each of their parents and getting to know them on a personal level. Not all of the children in Primary had active parents, and this deeply concerned me. I wanted my relationship with the Church as well as those I was in service for, to be a pleasant and rewarding one. Of course, none of this was possible without prayer, fasting and guidance from the Holy Ghost.

With support from the Holy Ghost, I have striven to make sure no "strangers" walk into the Church again. Since I am basically shy, becoming friendly and out-going has been a challenge for me - but a challenge I welcome. I must always remember, that the day I was baptized I became a missionary for my Heavenly Father. - Beth Praast, Greenough, Mont.

Be yourself

Just be yourself and do the things that it took to become a member. For me, joining was a process. My wife was already a member when I joined, so I was greatly exposed to Church meetings and activities. Thus, my conversion process included welcoming home teachers to our home, holding family home evening, going to Church with our family on Sunday and holding family prayer.

Now that I'm a member, I'm on the other end of functions such as home teaching and priesthood activities. Now I'm the one responsible to conduct family home evening and family prayer. I saw the benefits of these activities as an investigator, and I now enjoy more fully living the benefits as a member. The basics of Church involvement remain the same now as then. - Dave Berg, Kearns, Utah

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How to checklist:

1 Attend meetings, activities; share talents, offer service.

2 Reach out; don't wait for others to come to you.

3 Gain gospel knowledge; thus, you can help lift others.

4 Share your testimony; this forges spiritual bonds.

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WRITE TO US:

Sept. 30 "How to encourage participation in Church classes."

Oct. 14 "How to benefit from stake conference as an individual and/or as a family."

Oct. 21 "How to overcome discouragement while serving a full-time mission."

Oct. 28 "How to teach children to forgive."

Nov. 4 "How to protect yourself and loved ones from pornography."

Nov. 11 "How to safeguard your family from crime."

Nov. 18 "How to develop the gift of discernment."

Had any good experiences or practical success in any of the above subjects? Share them with our readers in about 100-150 words. Write the "How-to" editor, Church News, P.O. Box 1257, Salt Lake City, Utah 84110, or send fax to (801) 237-2121. Please include a name and phone number. Contributions may be edited or excerpted and will not be returned. Due to limited space, some contributions may not be used; those used should not be regarded as official Church doctrine or policy. Material must be received at least 12 days before publication date.