As the parents of seven active children, we have asked ourselves this question many times. The same answers seem to come up for us. They are the following:

- Setting goals and working to accomplish them, both as individuals and as a family unit. Goals keep us actively involved and focused in our lives here on earth and prepare us for our eternal lives. These goals consist of missions, education, talents, work, sports, Scouts, etc.Our stake presidency has reminded us of some familiar counsel to help in this area. It includes:

- Individual humble daily prayer.

- Family daily prayer.

- Individual daily scripture study.

- Family daily scripture study.

- Regular family council and family home evening.

- Serving others, which brings out the best in us and others. We've consciously found opportunities for our sons and daughters to serve others. They, in turn, have learned to feel the great spirit that comes with serving others.

- Being receptive to the promptings of the Spirit and, most important, acting upon them. Most of us are worthy to have the Holy Spirit with us, but the key to positive direction and focus is to heed the promptings.

To top it all off, we try to do the best we can and take a little advice from Peter Pan, "Maintain a happy thought!" Remember, in Luke 1:37, we read, "For with God nothing shall be impossible." - Russ and Sulet Hiatt, Sandpoint, Idaho

*****

How we did it:

Savior's example

In recent years, I have experienced considerable upheaval in my life, having gone through a divorce and loss of employment, both within eight months of each other. I am still unemployed and single after two years, and most would think I would have been drawn into great despair. But during this time, I was baptized into the Church. What drew me to this Church was its focus on striving to become more like our Savior. What more positive example and direction can we have? I have found great peace and joy amongst the turmoil of this world in following the counsel of His teachings through the scriptures and the words of our prophet and my priesthood leaders.

In seeking guidance and direction from the Spirit in even the smallest daily task, I have found a way to hone my skills in listening to that "still small voice" and to use this time as preparation for the future. Through prayer, scripture reading, temple attendance, service, my callings and my music, I invite the Spirit into my life, and only with Him I can move in a forward direction with faith and confidence. - Mary Katherine DeWitt, Tomball, Texas

How others feel

To find positive direction and focus in your life, take the focus off yourself. If we would take that focus and serve others, then the rewards come back to us two-fold. Then pretty soon, we're concerned with how to make another's life better. In the process, we're making our own lives better. We should do less thinking about how we feel, and more on how others feel. - Sylvia Joost, Stevensville, Mont.

Share happiness

Follow Christ unto salvation. We need to follow His perfect example. We need to express our love to everyone. Frequently find opportunities to serve one another. We need to listen to the promptings of the Spirit.

As a missionary in El Monte, Calif., I have seen a lot of things. My favorite scripture is Mosiah 4:30. It gives me a lot of advice. I need to watch myself, my thoughts, my words, my deeds and observe the commandments of God and continue in faith. This scripture tells not just me but all of us what we need to do. There are a lot of us that go day by day in the same routine without progressing. People get caught up in their comfort zone, and they don't want to change. We need to share with everyone our love and happiness of what we know. - Elder Jordan T. Stone, California Arcadia Mission

Bit of heaven

You find positive direction by watching the examples of others because you see in them what you want in your own life.

My bishop always shows the love of Christ through his example to others. He listens patiently; he tries to understand each person's problems, and he has the compassion to love everyone. He is a wonderful example to our ward and stake. Everyone values his counsel and friendship.

In addition, his whole family shows the example of loving one another by including people in their home for dinners and family activities.

Because of their example, I have found a positive direction to take in my life, and I've learned a bit of heaven can be on earth with examples like the bishop and his family. - Gloria Wells, Bartlesville, Okla.

Quiet dignity

In the past year, I have been looking more toward the leaders in the Church as well as successful people around me in order to gain a greater spiritual focus. An important concept that I have realized is how these people have mastered their physical bodies by conquering inadequacies of the flesh. They tend to have quiet dignity in their actions.

Look to great people in life because of the things they do, which stems from the things they believe. - Elder Michael S. Stringham, Missionary Training Center, Provo, Utah

Pray for direction

Pray for direction in your life. Be specific. Read the scriptures daily. Be mindful of the Lord's help in assisting us to help others. Realize that opportunities to serve seldom come at a convenient time. There are people all around us with greater challenges than ours.

Sometimes the very nature of our callings in the Church steers us in the right direction. Certain callings make us focus more on the Savior and what He would have us do with ourselves and in serving others.

All of the above allow us to see how much Heavenly Father cares about us individually and to focus our attention on Him and others - instead of ourselves.

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." (Prov. 3:5-6.) - Leigh and Amy Brookes, Lawrenceville, Ga.

Establish priorities

- Establish what values are important to you. By pondering and praying about what values are of highest priority, you can more clearly see your direction.

- Set clear goals and priorities about what you can realistically accomplish in your life right now. You can't do everything at once.

- Put aside feelings of guilt for what you can't fit into your life.

- Learn to say no if the task will distract you from what's really important in your life. Saying yes to incidental things sometimes means you can't accomplish your priorities. - Kirsty Kelly, Tucson, Ariz.

*****

How to checklist:

1. Follow Christ's example; look to those you admire.

2. Pray for focus, direction; study scriptures; follow counsel of Church leaders.

3. Set goals; work on them as individuals, families.

4. Serve others; think about how to make others happy, rather than yourself.

*****

Write to us:

Sept. 23 "How to forgive a child for the heartache caused by rebelliousness."

Sept. 30 "How to encourage participation in Church classes."

Oct. 14 "How to benefit from stake conference as an individual and/or as a family."

Oct. 21 "How to overcome discouragement while serving a full-time mission."

Oct. 28 "How to teach children to forgive."

Nov. 4 "How to protect yourself and loved ones from pornography."

Nov. 11 "How to safeguard your family from crime."

Had any good experiences or practical success in any of the above subjects? Share them with our readers in about 100-150 words. Write the "How-to" editor, Church News, P.O. Box 1257, Salt Lake City, Utah 84110, or send fax to (801) 237-2121. Please include a name and phone number. Contributions may be edited or excerpted and will not be returned. Due to limited space, some contributions may not be used; those used should not be regarded as official Church doctrine or policy. Material must be received at least 12 days before publication date.