How sorry is sorry?

In this modern day of public confession for private indiscretions, one wonders whether these apologies are sincere, or whether the wrongdoer is merely winking at the audience. Confession, it is said, is good for the soul, but confession these days almost seems to require public officials and celebrities calling a news conference to discuss their private lives in public arenas as if privacy no longer matters.What was once only heard in private is now broadcast around the world. Confessor and hearer wonder whether all this public chest beating has any effect at all on the human condition.

In perhaps the most public event dealing with transgression during the Savior's ministry, a woman was brought to him accused of adultery. No matter the motive of those who confronted the Savior with this woman, as the gospel writer recounts: "They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. . . . This they said tempting him, that they might have to accuse him." He discerned their thoughts and said, "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. . . . And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one. . . . When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? She said No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more." (See John 8:4-11.)

It is important to note that the Lord does not forgive this woman, as He forgave many others during His ministry. Several times He told individuals their sins were forgiven them, but not on this occasion. President Spencer W. Kimball wrote: "Could He forgive her? There seems to be no evidence of forgiveness. His command to her was `go and sin no more.' He was directing the sinful woman to go her way, abandon her evil life, commit no more sin, transform her life. He was saying, Go, woman, and start your repentance; and He was indicating to her the beginning step - to abandon her transgression." (Miracle of Forgiveness, p. 165.)

People who justify their own sinfulness, whether sexual or not, use this story to suggest the Savior set aside the woman's penalty. He did no such thing. She could not be saved while still in her sin. After time, upon reflection, remorse and resolve not to continue her grievous ways, she might then start on the road to repentance, and could then return and ask the Savior for forgiveness. No doubt this time it would not be in front of her accusers, but face-to-face with the Lord, who while not condemning her, nonetheless did not lecture her about her actions but pointed her to a new path.

We have been taught throughout the ages by God's prophets and others to avoid sin altogether. Why would anyone want to commit any act that would put his eternal salvation in jeopardy? Why test the Lord? Does He love us? Yes, of course. Will He forgive us? He will if we truly repent and seek His forgiveness. He holds the scales of justice and mercy in delicate balance. We might not know if an individual is sincere in His repentance, but that individual will not fool the Lord.

President Ezra Taft Benson remarked about the need for "real repentance." Such repentance, he said, is "a deep heartfelt sorrow for sin that produces a reformation of life. It is not just a confession of guilt. Sometimes we regard all too lightly the principle of repentance, thinking that it only means confession, that it only means feeling sorry for ourselves. But it is more than that. It is a deep burning and heartfelt sorrow for sin that will drive us to our knees in humility and tears - a deep heartfelt sorrow for sin that produces a reformation of life. That is the right test: a reformation of life." (God, Family, Country, p. 196.)

King Benjamin spoke of having a "peace of conscience" after receiving a witness of the spirit that one's sins are forgiven. (Mosiah 4:2-3.) This peace of conscience is what separates the truly penitent from the public pronouncer. The bonds of sin are real and will hold us back from our eternal potential. The miracle of forgiveness gives all of mankind hope for eternal glory.