Know what pornography is. Webster's dictionary states that pornography is "material (as books or a photograph) that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement." Much of what is available today in the media today is pornographic.

- Get out of denial. We have to know as parents that pornography is easily available to our children. Even "good" kids can get into it innocently.- Stop watching R-rated movies. President Ezra Taft Benson counseled the young men in a priesthood meeting to not see R-rated movies or vulgar videos or participate in any entertainment that is immoral, suggestive or pornographic. We need to make a decision as a family to follow the prophets.

- Be wise in your choice of magazines. Many magazines, especially those geared to teenagers, use sexual themes as their main articles. Advertisements in those magazines sometimes include nudity.

- Be proactive. Turn the TV off when there is inappropriate programming. Encourage creativity in your children. Have available paints, scissors, crayons and other creative materials. Read with your children.

- Attend and become more familiar with cultural events. Go to uplifting plays instead of the movies, play games with friends, attend uplifting concerts or sporting events.

The more children are exposed to positive entertainment and to feeling the Spirit, the more uncomfortable they will be around pornography. They will recognize the lack of the Spirit and the coldness. We sometimes desensitize our children and don't even realize it. - Laraine Chamberlain, Draper, Utah

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What we did:

`I don't have to listen'

As parents, we thought we had taught our children about the dangers of pornography, such as found in magazines and on television and videos. But several years ago, I discovered there are many ways our loved ones can be exposed to inappropriate things. I learned it is critical for us to teach them that they are empowered to act for themselves - and that they have the gift of the Holy Ghost.

My then-9-year-old daughter had never heard the words, "obscene phone call," but one day as an obscene caller persuaded her to stay on the telephone, she began to feel the Spirit of the Holy Ghost warning her. These are the words she described to me that came into her mind: "I am a good Mormon girl; I don't have to listen to these things. I can hang up the phone!"

She came immediately to my side. As I comforted her and praised her for her decisions, I was so thankful for the teachings of the gospel she had learned from Primary and in our family home evenings. She knew she could trust the Holy Ghost. We can teach that the power to resist pornography or any other evils resides within each of us as we keep ourselves worthy to have the Spirit of the Holy Ghost as our constant companion. What a great blessing this is. - Nanette K. Orgill, Edmond, Okla.

Shun evil

- Don't seek it out. The scriptures teach us to flee, turn from, shun, depart from, refuse and avoid the very appearance of evil.

- Keep your home and heart free from questionable material. Patronize quality entertainment that is virtuous and praiseworthy.

- Be as constructive as possible. I once wrote to a firm to say that while I enjoyed some of their products, their mailings included such explicit depictions of other materials that we could not accept their catalogs in our home. Many months later, I received a catalog free of objectionable material, along with a letter from the firm announcing their new "interest-specific" catalogs intended to better serve their customers' needs.- Nile Dean Meservy, Laurel, Md.

Innocent victims

It is very easy to become complacent on the issue of pornography and feel that if we do not have it in our homes our families are protected. While keeping it out of our lives and the lives of our loved ones is most important, many innocent women and children are assaulted by those who are addicted to it.

To help put this fight in perspective, we must realize that many counselors agree that exposure of a young child to just one photo or image of deviant material can have a profound and lasting influence. The child loses an important period of innocence.

Getting it out of our communities requires:

- Education.

- Commitment.

- Involvement.

- Perseverance. - Dallas D. Erickson, Stevensville, Mont.

Abhor like plague

If one understands the true nature of pornography, then one will abhor it like a plague.

- Pornography shows only lust, selfishness and pride.

- Womanhood, manhood, love, marriage, families and God are mocked.

- There is no sense of decency or virtue, no morality, no right or wrong, and no accountability.

Results from viewing pornography include:

- One will lose the Spirit, the worthiness to partake of the sacrament and the righteousness to use the priesthood.

- It becomes addictive. It promotes the desire for more. One is never satisfied.

- It leads to immorality and sex crimes. - Michael S. Puhlmann, Scottsdale, Ariz.

Don't be deceived

- Start in your own home and family. Teach your children correct principles about the sacredness of the human body, their own body as well as that of anyone else. Bodies are temples.

- Don't you or your children be deceived by the teachings of the media or even by some psychiatrists of the four myths of pornography. They are: 1. It is innocent entertainment with no harmful effects. 2. That it's a victimless crime. 3. That since it's in the video store, then it must be legal. 4. There is nothing we can do about it anyway.

According to a study made by Richard Drake, an assistant professor at BYU, pornography can be as "mood altering" and "addictive" as narcotics. And it leads to other victims through the sick actions of the addict as he or she tries to act out his or her addiction through sexual abuse, rape or even murder.

- Know your parental rights. According to the June 28 passage of the Parental Rights and Responsibilities Act of 1995 (PRRA), which passed both the House and the Senate, parents have a fundamental right to direct the upbringing of their children. We, as parents, have the right to not allow anything pornographic to come into our homes either through books, magazines, television, videos or over the computer.

- Join with other like-minded parents to fight pornography in the community. Pornography is a very serious problem in our nation and will not go way unless we as parents and concerned citizens join together in actively voicing our concerns and working together to get rid of it in our own communities. - E. Orlean Koehle, Santa Rosa, Calif.

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How to checklist:

1. Know what pornography is; don't seek it out; abhor it.

2. Create positive atmosphere in the home with uplifting activities, entertainment.

3. Join others in fighting pornography in the community.

4. Be wise in your choice of magazines, movies, videos; avoid questionable materials.

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WRITE TO US:

Nov. 18 "How to develop the gift of discernment."

Nov. 25 "How to foster good relationships with in-laws."

Dec. 2 "How to have the Christmas spirit while coping with death of a loved one."

Dec. 9 "How to keep Christ in your heart and mind all year, not just during holidays."

Dec. 16 "How to help elderly loved ones with their finances."

Dec. 23 "How to feel peace and contentment today, rather than always looking to the future for happiness."

Had any good experiences or practical success in any of the above subjects? Share them with our readers in about 100-150 words. Write the "How-to" editor, Church News, P.O. Box 1257, Salt Lake City, Utah 84110, or send fax to (801) 237-2121. Please include a name and phone number. Contributions may be edited or excerpted and will not be returned. Due to limited space, some contributions may not be used; those used should not be regarded as official Church doctrine or policy. Material must be received at least 12 days before publication date.