How to be more optimistic
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In a day when the headlines of every newspaper and television news program are tragedy and calamity, it hasn't been easy to be optimistic. My husband, however, is a "the-cup's-half-full' kind of guy and remains optimistic in any situation. As I have watched his example, I have learned a few tips on how to be more optimistic:
- See the opportunity for growth in trials. Our earthly experience is meant to bring us joy. There is great joy that comes from growth. When we see trials as opportunities for growth, we see trials as opportunities for increased joy.- Give others the benefit of the doubt. My husband assumes the best of every one and is seldom disappointed.
- Seek after happiness, "and he that seeketh findeth." (Matt. 7:8.) Just like being on a treasure hunt, we can look for the positive in things. If we are looking for good, rather than anticipating bad, we will find treasures of positive experiences in each day.
- Have an attitude of gratitude. It is easy to dwell on disappointments and tiresome tasks, but when we contemplate the wonderful things we do have in our lives, such as our families and the gospel, we find many reasons to rejoice.
- Thank our Heavenly Father for our blessings and ask for His help. My husband never utters a prayer without thanking His Heavenly Father for the goodness in his life. I have tried to pattern my personal prayers after his example. When I begin my day thanking my Heavenly Father for the things He has blessed me with, it reminds me of myriad things I have to be optimistic about. I also have found that when I ask Him to help me be more optimistic, He uses the Spirit throughout the day to open my eyes to the beauty of my life. - Kari O'Grady, Parker, Colo.
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What we did:
Take second look
Situations can be better if we look at them in a different way. I'm reminded of a cartoon strip. In the first frame there is a bird sitting on the only limb of the only tree on a very small island in a big ocean; the bird is crying. In the next frame, a fish sticks his head out of the water and asks what is wrong. The bird replies that he feels so lonely for this little island being all alone in the big ocean. The fish lets the bird know that the island is the very tip of one of the largest undersea land masses around and the tree is viewed with much prestige since it's at the very top. The final frame shows the bird in the tree, singing.
We can feel differently about the negative things we feel and see simply by stepping back and taking a second look. It also can help us see things more optimistically if we try to understand how someone else is positively viewing things. - Jeff Wright, Cheyenne, Wyo.
Expect good things
I thought optimists were born that way and were usually pushy and inconsiderate. But that's not the definition. It's to look on the bright side of things or to have hope and faith. I strive to do the following:
- I don't take it personally when someone says something unkind.
- I know the Lord has helped me throughout my life, but I didn't expect the "good things" to continue. I do now.
- I study books that I feel are compatible with gospel standards.
- I work at repenting of being pessimistic, not just adopting slogans.
- I heed the optimistic teachings of President Gordon B. Hinckley.
As a result, I can solve problems easier. I love other people more. I have more faith that the Lord will continue to help me do His will. I feel happier most of the time instead of the gloomy way I felt before. - Allen D. Carlson, West Jordan, Utah
Live righteously
For someone to be optimistic, he/she must live righteously. Criticism hinders us from becoming more optimistic. Faultfinding and backbiting are some of the evil speakings that destroy the Spirit and well-being of the criticizer, and then cause lack of optimism. We must still our voices of insult and sarcasm in order for us to be more optimistic.
In addition, obedience to the commandments of God helps us to be more optimistic. - Mba Ogburubi, Lagos, Nigeria
Gifts, talents
My husband and I both have physical challenges, some that include a great deal of pain. He is unable to work and I can only work part time, so our finances sometimes require a lot of optimism to make them stretch from pay day to pay day. I am not able to conceive and have been upset about that.
Instead of mourning what we don't have, we have polished and added to the gifts and talents that we have. We tithe fully, obey the gospel laws and hold Church callings. These things make people happy when they do them, so we do.
We also understand the law of opposition. We find that if some talent has been withheld from us, we are given a generous, overflowing measure of one or more other talents. We also thank Heavenly Father for everything, even if we don't understand or really appreciate it. We know He's strengthening us for service now and on the other side of the veil.
Read John 15 - the whole chapter. Look for the blessings in tribulations. Be prepared for trouble. Face challenges. Read what our prophet has to say about opposition. Accept help when offered, and ask for it when needed; extend help when you can. Fulfill all your callings, including visiting teaching and home teaching. - Dayonda (Dandy) Stribling, Longview, Wash.
Chased away blues
Our lives had been turned upside down. My poor children were drooping sadly. They'd lost their father, faced austere times, and their mother was weeping non-stop.
Then I was inspired to sing some happy songs. I sang facing the sink doing dishes, I sang from the bedroom making the bed, etc. It worked! My tears stopped! Smiles and fun were again in order. We never let sadness get us down again. We laughed! We sang! It always chased the blues away. - Beth Ryan, Idaho Falls, Idaho
Physical check-up
- Have a physical check-up, including thyroid function tests. There can be a physical cause for depression and low feelings.
- Make sure you are getting enough sleep, as near as possible.
- Check your diet. Cutting down on or eliminating sugar and/or food allergens and/or sources of sensitivity causing molds or chemicals (food additives, colors, etc.) can make a big difference. Many people are sensitive to sugar and caffeine. Effects may include irritability, depression, weepiness and other mood changes.
- Check for the need for vitamin/mineral supplementation. Not everyone absorbs all they need from even a good diet. The addition of vitamins and/or minerals may improve your outlook considerably.
- Exercise regularly. This is known to release endorphins, which are natural mood elevators. - Elsie Crocfer, Albuquerque, N.M.
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Write to us:
Oct. 5 "How to financially prepare your family for missions, education."
Oct. 19 "How to support your wife as she serves as an auxiliary leader."
Oct. 26 "How to be more sensitive to those around you in different marital and family circumstances."
Nov. 2 "How to take responsibility for your own happiness."
Nov. 9 "How to find joy `in the morning.' "
Nov. 16 "How to instill spirit of Thanksgiving in children."
Had any good experiences or practical success in any of the above subjects? Share them with our readers in about 100-150 words. Write the "How-to" editor, Church News, P.O. Box 1257, Salt Lake City, Utah 84110, send fax to (801) 237-2121 or use internet E-mail: Churchnews@desnews.com. Please include a name and phone number. Contributions may be edited or excerpted and will not be returned. Due to limited space, some contributions may not be used; those used should not be regarded as official Church doctrine or policy. Material must be received at least 12 days before publication date.

