Church Educational System fireside, Sunday, November 2, 2008

What Manner of Men and Women Ought Ye to Be?

Sister Burton and I, along with some of our family, including three BYU students, a Utah State University student, and a pretty friend, Crystal Ming attending at the Institute at the University of Washington, are delighted to be with you this Sabbath evening. Barbara and I dearly love to associate with the rising generation. We love your exuberance. We love your faithfulness. We love you for what you have accomplished in your young lives and for what you will yet accomplish as you serve the Lord and one another. We love you for the virtue and goodness that shows in your faces and accompanies your presence.

Two weeks ago we participated in a devotional at the Nauvoo Temple for temple workers, most of whom are several generations older than most of you. We felt the presence of a wonderful spirit on that occasion in that glorious, holy house. We feel that same sweet spirit as we visit with you tonight. Nevertheless, you are a bit intimidating as you gather in large numbers, both in this remarkable building and in many other places throughout the world via satellite and other technology.

I will never forget my first experience speaking at a general conference of the Church. My invitation indicated that I was to speak for 14 minutes in the Sunday morning session and follow President Howard W. Hunter. Needless to say, the circumstances were very intimidating to me. A week or so before general conference Elder Russell M. Nelson inquired about how my talk was progressing. I confided to Elder Nelson that I was struggling with my preparation, and then it occurred to me that the only reason he knew I was speaking was because his invitation indicated that he was to follow me. Armed with this little piece of information, I boldly asked Elder Nelson why someone as green and scared as I would be placed between President Hunter and himself. He thought for a moment and then with an ever-present twinkle in his eye he said, “Bishop, the only reason I can think of is that you have been placed there by inspiration to make us look good.”

Nearly a half century ago, just prior to my missionary service in Australia, I had the great blessing to work for about four years in a golf shop for an extraordinary Scottish golf professional. His name was Alex C. McCafferty. He was not of our faith and though he had lived among LDS people for over 25 years, he did not really understand our doctrine. He was a splendid man to work for and I will be ever grateful for his generosity and kindness. His patient tutoring in the fine points of the game helped me become successful in some of my youthful competitive experiences and has also allowed me to enjoy a lifetime of recreational golf. On occasion his language, wrapped in a heavy Scottish accent, could be rather colorful. When my work didn’t meet Alex’s expectations or when I made a mistake in serving a patron, he would in a very soft but firm Scottish voice, utter an expletive followed by the same question: “David, my boy, will you ever make something of yourself?” I still remember the exact words he used when I finally gathered the courage to inform him I had accepted a call from a prophet of God to serve for two years as a missionary in Australia; hence I would be leaving his employ. On this occasion his response was preceded by several expletives and then the declaration, “David, my boy, you will never make anything of yourself by fluttering around the world speaking about religion.”

A day or two before I departed for my mission, I stopped by to say goodbye to my good friend Alex. As I shook his hand and offered expressions of appreciation, he drew me close and placed in my hand an envelope. We both had a tear or two in our eyes as I quickly walked to my car. I drove for a few minutes to a nearby park, where in the solitude of the surroundings I read his note and found he had placed a goodly sum of money in it to help me finance my mission.

About one year later, while I was serving in Adelaide, Australia, I received a note from Alex. The note said: “David, my boy, they tell me a missionary needs a new suit after one year. Please, with this money, buy you a suit made of the finest Scottish wool.”

A few days after returning from Australia, I stopped by the golf course to renew our acquaintance. Alex asked if I was ready to play golf. I told him my days of serious golf were over, as I had sold my clubs and car to help defray the costs of my mission, and in addition it was also long past time when I really needed to get serious about my education. He replied, starting with the usual expletive, “David, my boy, you will never make something of yourself if you don’t play golf. You go right into the golf shop and pick out a set of clubs of your choice.” I did just that and after nearly 50 years I still have those clubs. Of course I didn’t appreciate Alex’s colorful language, but I will ever be grateful for the lessons of honesty, integrity, and generosity I learned while in his employ.

Over the years I have often reflected on Alex’s question: Will you ever make something of yourself? Alex was, in his own way, expressing his displeasure with me. He was questioning my capacity to follow directions, my attention to the tasks at hand, and my job commitment. He was also questioning whether there was a desire on my part to be a successful, productive, and contributing adult. I have pondered those questions over and over again. I must admit that I still require the “work in process” label. I have also concluded that Alex was questioning my life’s achievements and not so much life’s journey. His question, however, does beg the question: what constitutes success in this life?

A much better question for us to focus on is not whether we will make something of ourselves and therefore be successful in the eyes of the world, but rather the question posed by the Savior Himself: “Therefore, what manner of men [or women] ought ye to be? Verily I say unto you, even as I am.” (1) Further, the Savior indicated, “For that which ye have seen me do even that shall ye do.” (2)

What manner of men and women ought ye to be? In my ponderings, I continue to ask: What are the attributes of a Christlike life? What is the appropriate pattern to use in coping with the challenges of life? What does it mean to be “even as I am”? I certainly don’t know all that is expected, but attributes like love of God and fellowmen, compassion, example, obedience, service, and keeping covenants, may be a few.

Recently an acquaintance of ours and a good, close friend of our daughter and son-in-law passed away after a gallant and prolonged battle with a brain tumor. Just prior to his passing, a friend sent a bit of prose to our friend’s wife expressing his feelings. With their permission I share its contents, not for its literary excellence, but rather for the feelings conveyed. It starts:

“Diane,

Please tell Harold 'thank you,'

For changing my life,

And showing me an example,

Of priesthood leadership,

Of caring for the one,

Of selfless, tireless service,

And true, Christlike love.

“Please tell Harold of the many memories

That I carry with me each day

That strengthen me,

And guide me---

Memories he gave me

When I served with him.

“Please tell Harold how his example,

As a loving husband,

And kind father,

As a faithful servant of the Lord

Full of humor,

Full of vision,

Has given me a standard to reach for

And has blessed the lives of my own wife and children.

“Please tell Harold it was a great honor

To have known him in this mortal life

And to have served with him.

“Please tell Harold of the tears I shed,

And the pain in my heart,

To know he will soon return

And report.

“Please tell Harold I love him

For his kindness,

His example,

And his friendship.

“Please tell Harold I will miss him

But will eagerly prepare myself

To rejoice with him again

In the Heavenly courts of the Most High God.

“Please tell Harold I will serve the Lord

With all my heart, might, mind and strength

In memory of his example,

And dedication,

And devotion to the Lord.

“Please tell Harold…

Thank you.” (3)

The “Please Tell Harold” attributes may also be worthy of incorporating in our lives. When virtues such as example, priesthood power, caring for the one, service, love, loving husband and father, kindness, friendship, devotion and dedication can be ascribed to us, as they were to Harold, certainly our lives can be deemed Christlike, hence fulfilling and successful.

President Thomas S. Monson often refers to his Scottish heritage and his experiences as a young boy living in close proximity to his Scottish grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. I have to wonder how many times he heard something similar to “Tommy, my boy, are you ever going to amount to something?” I suspect as a boy with a wide variety of interests, a very creative and imaginative mind, and a whole lot of energy, he may have been asked that question a few times.

President Monson’s life gives us a pattern to follow in our own lives. This is particularly true in what I call his private ministry. His public ministry is an open book, filled with outstanding service at the ward, stake, mission, and general Church level. I doubt there has been anyone in this dispensation more devoted to each of his ecclesiastical assignments than President Thomas S. Monson.

From time to time we get a glimpse into his private ministry. Serving, being concerned, reaching out and blessing the “one,” and offering encouragement and comfort are all integral parts of his private ministry.

Recently a lovely neighbor required a short stay in a rehabilitation facility. When we visited her, she couldn’t wait to tell us that President Monson had dropped by their sacrament meeting. “He was so close,” she exclaimed, “that I could reach out and touch him.” How thrilled she was to feel that the President of the Church was concerned about her. President Monson lives by the creed he often teaches: “The five most important words in the English language are—‘I am proud of you.’ The four most important include: ‘What is your opinion?’ The three most important are: ‘If you please.’ The two most important are: ‘Thank you.’ The least important is: ‘I.’ ”

The Savior often used parables to teach important lessons. Likewise, President Monson loves to use stories to illustrate his teachings. President Eyring, in reflecting on President Monson’s use of stories, said that you will think you have heard the story before, but if you are patient and listen intently, you will find the stories are not the same because the Spirit will prompt you to receive the message in a different way.

One of the stories he uses comes from his days as a deacon. President Monson and the other members of his quorum were assigned to be Eskimos in the ward’s road show. President Monson’s sister was playing the part of Lady Liberty. When his sister came down with a severe case of laryngitis at performance time, it was feared that she would not be able to speak her lines and the show would be impaired. The “Eskimos” decided to do something about this situation. They gathered in a room in the basement of their meetinghouse and knelt in prayer. They sought the Lord’s intervening Spirit in behalf of President Monson’s sister. At the appointed time, Lady Liberty was able to deliver her lines in a clear voice. President Monson’s sister remembered the experience as being a miracle in her life and was grateful for the Eskimos.

This simple story reminds us that President Monson has always been a person of great faith and prayer. He uses those great gifts to bless the lives of many today. An example of what manner of men and women ought we to be—people of faith and prayer. Prayer is essential to our personal strength and conviction. Remember Nephi’s question to his disbelieving brethren: “Have ye inquired of the Lord?” (4) President Monson’s life of service is a pattern we could use to define and structure our own lives.

Many of you are at a stage of life when you will be making decisions which will shape your earthly lives as well as your eternal lives. Some of you are in the process of making decisions about your education. Others of you may be contemplating a mission. Many may be endeavoring to decide what they wish to do for a career, or life’s work. Perhaps some of you may be trying to decide if he or she is the right person to be your eternal companion. These decisions will be much easier if you take them before the Lord in prayer.

A few of you may be struggling with sin and are trying to decide if you wish to be cleansed by the atoning power of Jesus Christ. Some may be faltering in their testimonies of the gospel and trying to determine what can be done to reverse the direction. Decisions about these and other important matters will have a huge impact on what manner of men and women you will be and what you will accomplish during your lifetime, or using my friend Alex’s words, what you will make of yourselves.

Life’s really critical and life-shaping decisions are usually very difficult to make. There always are those little “ifs,” “ands,” or “buts” that tend to complicate and delay the answer. I have often wished that there was a magic pill we could take which would cause us to always make the optimal decision. But lacking the magic pill, may I offer just one suggestion to aid you in your decision-making process? Seek the participation of our Father in Heaven through humble prayer and then have the faith and determination to follow His counsel as conveyed by the Holy Spirit. The Lord asks that we study things out in our minds and then ask Him. He promises, “I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.” (5) The manner of men and women you will become will be enhanced as you listen and obey the “still, small voice.” Remember, part of listening is “feeling that it is right.”

In the United States we have just concluded another baseball season. The World Series has ended and a new champion has been crowned. Well over 50 years ago a very fine athlete played left field for the Boston Red Sox. His career in baseball was interrupted on two different occasions by calls to serve in the military as a fighter pilot. The media referred to him as the “Splendid Splinter” because he was very thin in statue but very adept at hitting the baseball. His major claim to fame as it relates to sports is that he was the last major-league player to have a batting average over .400 for the entire year. This means he was successful in getting on base because he hit the ball over 4 times for each 10 times he was up to bat. No one has been able to duplicate his feat in the last half century. That player’s name was Ted Williams.

Many years after his baseball career was over, the public learned something very interesting about Ted—his eyesight was better than 20/20. Apparently with this excellent and extraordinary eyesight Ted had a little advantage in that he could see the ball a little better than other players and had an additional micro-second to determine if he should swing at the pitch.

We who have been baptized and have received the gift of the Holy Ghost as a constant companion also have an advantage when it comes to making difficult decisions. Just as success in real estate matters is location, location, location, taking advantage of the Holy Ghost is listen, listen, listen!

I sometimes worry, and am somewhat embarrassed, that my generation has burdened your generation with issues and challenges which we should have resolved. While much progress has been made in making life better, longer, safer, and more fulfilling, there remains much to lament relating to greed, relationships, and environment, to name a few. We are facing the uncertainties that arise out of the turbulent times we are in. It could be very easy to be discouraged and perhaps even be a little depressed as we think about the array of potential impacts. The uncertainties of the job market coupled with significant economic dislocation all add to the uneasiness of our day. Nations continue to contend against one another. In spite of all of this my young friends, we need not fear nor take counsel from our fears. The scriptures remind us that if we are prepared, if we are obedient, and if we are members of the Lord’s Church, we need not fear what the future holds. “The righteous need not fear.” (6) What manner of men and women we will be, in part, will be influenced by how well we handle the fearsome and unforeseen aspects of life. Realizing that real life is made up of struggles, problems, mistakes, opportunities, and lessons, please remember the old Chinese proverb: “The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.” Or stated in the Lord’s terms, “For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things.” (7)

In spite of all the world’s uncertainties and shortcomings, there is so very much to be grateful for and excited about. I am an optimist. I have come to believe 2008 is the most exciting time in the history of the world to be alive and have the supernal blessing of having the fullness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ available to us. My spine tingles as I watch the way the gospel is being established in the hearts and minds of Father’s children around the globe.

I suspect few, if any, of you know what occurs at Church headquarters on the first Friday in December of each year. That is the day traditionally set aside for the convening of the Council on the Disposition of the Tithes as directed by the Lord in the 120th section of the Doctrine and Covenants. Under the direction of the First Presidency, the Quorum of the Twelve and the Presiding Bishopric all meet to determine how the resources of the Church will be used in the coming year. It is exciting to see the many new places of worship are authorized and constructed. The number of new temples continues to grow. Bishops all over the world are provided the resources to seek out and help the poor. Missionaries in more than 350 missions are sustained. Projects to accelerate the work of the temples are approved. Funds are set aside to facilitate higher education and religious education. The work of the Lord marches on to achieve its prophetic destiny. I take courage when I think of the great statement of faith made by the prophet Joseph: “No unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing.” (8) Isn’t it exciting to realize that you will have the opportunity to be at the forefront of this miracle that is destined to occur? What manner of men and women you will be will in part be a function of your devotion and assistance in moving His kingdom forward. Along with devotion, much self-discipline is required. Jim Rohn, a noted motivational speaker, said, “Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.”

I love sacred music, particularly hymns of praise or motivation. One such hymn we often sing is “Come, Let Us Anew.” The words were penned in the 1700s by Charles Wesley. The music is attributed to James Lucas. The outstanding choir from the Utah State University Institute has sung (or will sing) this beautiful hymn for us this evening. Latter-day Saints gather in sacrament meetings, devotionals, and other settings to sing, pray, and renew covenants and commitment, as well as offer mutual encouragement. We get a synergistic-type renewal when we meet together. Music plays an important role in this process. It can soothe our souls and sensitize our spirits on heavenly things. The Lord has reminded us that “the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me.” (9) Please take note of the lyrics of this hymn of encouragement:

Come, let us anew our journey pursue,

Roll round with the year,

And never stand still till the Master appear.

His adorable will let us gladly fulfill,

And our talents improve

By the patience of hope and the labor of love.

Our life as a dream,

Our time as a stream

Glide swiftly away,

And the fugitive moment refuses to stay;

For the arrow is flown and the moments are gone.

The millennial year

Presses on to our view,

And eternity’s here.

Oh, that each in the day of His coming may say,

“I have fought my way thru;

I have finished the work thou didst give me to do.”

Oh, that each from his Lord may receive the glad word:

“Well and faithfully done;

Enter into my joy and sit down on my throne.” (10)

The message of encouragement conveyed in this hymn is clear. It suggests that in our quest to become as the Savior suggested, “even as I am,” we must often renew our enthusiasm and never stand still in our good works until the Master appears. If we delay, time will pass us by and the fugitive moment will forever be gone. Each of us in the day of His coming will want to report, “I have fought my way thru; I have finished the work Thou didst give me to do.” And great will be the feeling when in response we hear, “Well and faithfully done; enter into my joy and sit down on my throne.” This can be our lot if our objective is to be the manner of men and women the great “I Am” suggests we be.

Often members of our Church are critically scrutinized and held to a higher standard than our friends of other faiths. Have you noticed that often in reporting the news the media will resort to headlines like “Mormon Bishop commits . . .; Former LDS Missionary involved in . . .; Mormon Mom indicted for . . .”? What we do in our anonymity is just as important as what we do when observed in public. Often there are eyes watching us from unseen vantage places. We live in “glass houses.” A few months ago I was repairing a broken water line. In the process my clothes got wet and muddy, and my arms were covered in grease. I discovered I needed a part to repair the line and, rather than taking the time to clean myself up, I jumped in the car and drove to Home Depot. As I was carefully examining the array of parts to make sure I purchased the right size with the right thread spacing, a man I did not know walked down the aisle and passed behind me. As he walked a few feet beyond me I heard him say, “That doesn’t look like the Presiding Bishop to me.” I was embarrassed beyond words because I had failed to live up to the standard expected of me. This time I asked myself critically, David, my boy, are you ever going to learn?

Ambition and hard work are vital ingredients in achieving worthy objectives. You are a generation of great promise. You have been endowed with many God-given gifts. You are bright and intelligent. Those of you who use your intelligence to achieve well-conceived goals are destined to be successful. Those who are intelligent, goal-oriented, and ambitious will likely be the manner of men and women our Father in Heaven is depending upon to move His kingdom forward. Salvador Dalí, a Spanish painter, reminds us, “Intelligence without ambition is like a bird without wings.”

Near the end of my mission, the World Cup Golf Tournament was held at the Royal Melbourne golf club, and amateur golfers were given an opportunity to play with a professional in the pre-tournament practice rounds. On the last day of my mission, I was able to participate in this practice round, although I won’t bore you with the details of how that occurred. When it was my turn to draw from the hat the name of the professional I would be playing with, I drew the name of Arnold Palmer. Talk about the amount of intimidation associated with speaking at general conference! That level of intimidation was only a very small part of the amount I felt the second I saw the name ‘Arnold Palmer’ on my slip. I, of course, hadn’t had a golf club in my hands for over two years, and I was totally stressed out!

I don’t remember much about the round of golf except that I played very poorly. On the 17th hole we hit our tee shots. We walked a few feet and I hit my second shot and shortly thereafter my third before we finally arrived at Mr. Palmer’s ball. The young Australian man caddying for Mr. Palmer was trying very hard to please him. I overheard the caddy tell Mr. Palmer that on the left the topography sloped with a stream hidden from view. He then said on the right the grass was very long and difficult to swing a club through. Mr. Palmer placed his club back into the bag and quietly but firmly said to the young caddy, “Please don’t clutter my mind with what is on the right, and I’m not interested in what is on the left. The only piece of information I require from you is the exact distance from this ball to the flag on the green.” My, that was a powerful learning experience for me. I suddenly realized the criticality of focusing on what is important and not be distracted by what may be on the left or on the right. Focus is essential in achieving our goals. Too many of us are concerned about what is on the right and what is on the left and fail to adequately focus on the principal objective that is right down the middle. When we fail to focus on the right things, it is difficult to become the “manner of men and women” that we desperately want to be. In this endeavor, remember that the Lord promised that “I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.” (11)

I pray that we will always endeavor in our lives to focus on matters of most importance—I testify we are on the Lord’s errand. We are blessed to be led by living prophets. I have been blessed to have served under the direction of four prophets of this dispensation. I think I know something about prophets and testify that Thomas Spencer Monson is a prophet of God in every sense of the word. I know we have a loving and living Father in Heaven. We are his sons and daughters. I am grateful for His Only Begotten Son, who is our Savior who atoned for our sins. For all of you who may feel lost, or feel you are devoid of hope, or that sin has impaired your progress, I testify that His atonement is available and his mercy endureth forever. I know that Joseph Smith was the prophet of the restoration. I take this opportunity to invoke the blessings of heaven upon each of you. This blessing I invoke praying that you may be responsive and determined to be the manner of men and women our Father in Heaven wishes for you to be and do so by the authority vested in me and in the holy name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Notes

1. 3 Nephi 27:27.

2. 3 Nephi 27:21.

3. “Please Tell Harold,” by Christian Weibell.

4. 1 Nephi 15:8.

5. D&C 9:8.

6. 1 Nephi 22:22; see also Alma 1:4; D&C 10:55.

7. 2 Nephi 2:11.

8. History of the Church, 4:540

9. D&C 25:12.

10. Hymns, no. 217.

11. D&C 84:88.