In love and war, faith comes first
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Don and Lilia Bullock found peace in the Raleigh North Carolina Temple after almost a year at war in Afghanistan.
Following their return home in February from deployment to Kandahar Air Base — Brother Bullock flies Apache attack helicopters, and Sister Bullock is an intelligence officer — the couple was sealed for time and all eternity on April 17.
"It was a small ceremony, but I was able to share it with my three brothers, my father, my bishop and my Relief Society president," Sister Bullock wrote in an e-mail. "It was a beautiful day, perfect for (such a) sacred ceremony."
Road to Raleigh
The Bullocks married in December 2008. Two months later Brother Bullock joined the Church. Sister Bullock was already a member.
In April 2009 they each received a one-year deployment to Afghanistan as part of the U.S. Army's 82nd Combat Aviation Brigade based out of Fort Bragg, N.C. Although they both lived and worked on Kandahar Air Base, no married housing was available so the couple couldn't live together. Their interaction was generally limited to mealtimes. And yet, the Bullocks successfully cultivated the spiritual aspect of their marriage with simple yet powerful daily routines.
"When we got married, we were counseled to read and pray together daily to strengthen our marriage," Sister Bullock said. "We took that to heart. We fit in scripture study and spousal prayer either before breakfast or after dinner, as time permitted.
"We definitely set aside breakfast and dinner as our times to be able to just enjoy each other's company and unwind. We were blessed to be able to have even that much time with each other. It helped to be able to at least have each other to lean on when having a difficult day or when needing to share a story."
Full circle
Brother Bullock travelled a circuitous path to his baptism, spending his first eight years in the Church but not being baptized until two months after marrying his wife.
The roundabout journey began in Southern California where he spent his formative years living with his mother and great-grandmother who were both LDS. However, shortly before he turned 8 years old and became eligible for baptism, his mother remarried.
"[His stepfather] was not religious, so therefore we couldn't be," Brother Bullock recalled.
Fast-forward 25 years. As their dating relationship grew serious, Don Bullock and then-girlfriend Lilia Trujillo arrived at a spiritual crossroads.
"One day, she had a talk with me and let me know where she stood about our relationship and (church attendance)," Brother Bullock said. "She made it really clear to me that the Church came before me, but also that our relationship was important and that she didn't want to lose me."
He committed to church attendance, but with a caveat: no singles wards.
"I told Lilia that I would like to start going to church with her," he said. "The only condition was that we go to the family ward because I planned on us being a family, so there was no point going to the singles ward."
In deciding to join the Church in February 2009, Brother Bullock felt the influence of Maxine Farrell, his great-grandmother who passed away in 2006.
"I believe people can have such an impact in your life that can influence decisions you make years down the road," he said. "I believe my decision to start going to church again with Lilia and eventually to get baptized was influenced by my great-grandmother and the things that she taught me when I was a child and lived with her."
Faithful service
In Afghanistan, Sister Bullock simultaneously filled three callings for the Kandahar Military Branch: Relief Society president, pianist and music coordinator.
While the musical responsibilities were relatively straightforward, the Relief Society calling proved decidedly more complicated.
Although the branch in Kandahar is the largest of the Kabul Afghanistan Military District, its Relief Society is small and getting smaller because of sisters redeploying or branching out to more remote bases without an organized Relief Society.
"With our demanding schedules and geographical challenges, it was hard to actually be able to visit everyone," Sister Bullock said. "We did the best we could and, unfortunately, relied heavily on e-mail."
With so much responsibility on her shoulders, there were days in Afghanistan when all Sister Bullock could do was simply endure.
"Honestly, it was a balancing act between church, work and my marriage," she reflected. "I had very little down-time when it came to other activities. …
"My time there wouldn't be forever, so I tried to keep that perspective as I went about my daily duties and tried not to get overwhelmed with what was expected of me."
Looking ahead
The Bullocks reside in the Cameron Ward of the Fayetteville North Carolina West Stake. Brother Bullock plans on remaining in the military for the foreseeable future. Sister Bullock, though, will leave active military service in December, at which time she hopes to begin having a family.
